Keep in mind, women like to plan ahead, at least a few days in advance. This helps us decide will it be worth shaving our legs for? Traditionally, women are detailed oriented communicators, so the more details about the date, the better. If you give her some idea or you both can agree on a mutually interesting thing to do, she can dress for it.
Do your best not to disappoint her last minute, it will only add more time for you to wait for her to get dressed – again. Last minute changes are disappointing, this can give her the impression you did not value the opportunity enough to make sure it was well organized. Miminize that frustration level, she may not enjoy the evening as much filled with emotional upset and have that feeling associated with you. This will then take you longer to repair that ill mindset.
Make a few phone calls and ask interested in her questions to get to know her lifestyle and work schedule. This should be discussed in order to find the appropriate time frames. What you’re aiming for is a day in the middle of the week or her Friday night, her first night of her weekend, even if it’s on a Monday.
If she works the traditional 8:00 a.m. – 5:00 p.m. banker business hours then you have to work around that. If she has kids who have activities, work around that. If her work schedule is the traditional Monday through Friday day hours then the following days are ideal.
1. Wednesday
Wednesdays are usually what I call bowling or bridge nights. Working for over twenty years in telemarketing sales and waiting tables, I’ve discovered Wednesday nights are the designated weeknight for a social activity. Be it church, choir, family game night, bridge club, book club, dart league, and so on. People are out of their homes or hosting in their homes. It helps break the monotony of a long work week.
But do not invite her to your social group quite yet or in your home. This is too much pressure for a first date. If you are in a social group, make the decision whether you will skip it to go out on a date. If you want to go bowling with your date, just be sure it is at a different location than where your league meets to avoid interruptions from curious associates. This night is about you two getting to know each other, not others getting to know more about your private life.
This night is ideal for a two to three hour date. If she works in the morning, be sure to have her home at a decent hour so she will be functional at work the next day. Avoid tempting her with a bar atmosphere or a late night coffee filled with caffiene as you do not want to be the blame of her poor performance at work. Don't drink alot on the first date. She may conclude from the impression you enjoy drinking too much and it may be a personal problem she may not want to deal with.
2. Friday
Friday nights are what I have observed as date nights. If either of you work the 8-5 Mon-Fri routine, this night helps you look forward to something for the weekend. However, it also helps you to use it as a scape goat if the night is not working well. The excuse ‘I’m really tired’ could also be the truth though, so don’t feel really disappointed or assuming she’s not interested if your date does not want to party til 2 am with you.
If she’s ready to go home, then respect that and take her home, you would rather her have a good image of you than a poor one. Its only a first a date, if you want to hang out all night afterwards, then drop her off and call your buddies.
Showing her you respect her well being gives her a good image of you. Whether it be the last one or not, she at least won’t feel guilty about doing something she may have regretted. You can move on and know at least you or her didn’t waste more time on something that wasn’t going to work out and either one of you would be miserable.
Don’t assume instantly she isn’t interested in a second date. It could really be a number of legitimate reasons: If she has kids, her body is used to going to sleep at a decent hour in order for her to be up hours before her kids. Her anticipation to see you all week kept her up with excitement. She may also have something planned in the morning.
Follow up with a phone call in a couple days. Call her on Sunday or Monday evening, the planning the week ahead days, to see if she would be interested in a second date either on Wednesday or Friday or her mid week night or first night of the weekend.
