5 White Lie Break Up Lines

Are you debating how to turn your current suitor down delicately?  The experienced ones learn along the way to use phrases, that we hope, won't cause too much hurtful feelings. No one likes to break some one's heart and we're even more afraid of an unpredictable unpleasant reaction in return. The purpose of a white lie break up line is to softly mask while sparing hurtful feelings.  They may not be entirely true but used to cushion the blow of an already dramatic separation event.

1. I got back with my ex.

We know what you're thinking, "You mean the one you've been complaining about you can't stand anymore?"  If you don't know the ex, never met the ex, and don't know what the ex looks like, this excuse can't be checked for validity. The pattern of break ups and make ups is always a possibility.

2. I'm being transferred for work.

This can be used as an avoidance excuse to mask his true feelings of how he wants to stay away from you. This line can be delivered in many different variations that can trigger suspicions even in committed relationships:  "Working late at the office. Relocating for a job assignment, moving, deployed..etc."  If you aren't close enough to know where he works or have access to his job, then there isn't a way to check up on him to see if its true. And if you do, you will be viewed as an unstable stalker.  The appearance of someone being distant is not necessary an indication of disinterest.

3.  I just don't have time for a relationship right now.

This can be another version of number 2, take that how you want to interpret it.  If a person is truly interested in someone, they make the time. Be it a note of reassurance, a fifteen minute chat break, or a quick loving text. Long periods of absence will cause suspicion and feelings of neglect creep in. We often go after those things that we desire. Pursuing someone makes them feel desired. This phrase can also be followed up with: "It wouldn't be fair to you."

4.  It's not you- it's me

This classic overused line is usually followed up with: " I think I need time to myself. I need to get my life in order. We have different needs...and so on" This is a way to get out of listing all the wrong things about the other person. An attempt to deflect the blame back on to you.  Be wary, revealing your own faults can give them things to use against you if the moment turns into a anger fest competition match.

5. You're too good for me.

A few reasons people use this excuse is because expectations may seem too high, guilt, and comparisons of different social classes or The Pretty Woman effect.  Expectations may seem too high to achieve realistically from the unsatisfied party and it could feel like they automatically respond by finding faults in the smallest imperfections rather than being appreciative of the majority of good things going on.  

Feelings of guilt may arise from someone who isn't doing more towards the relationship.  They withhold putting effort into something that they feel they have no desire of it blossoming into something deeper and they don't want to give a false hope impression. Resentment can build with the feeling of unfairness of energy given and accusations of being used can be brought up.  The giver is now the one who is too good for the taker.


Know that the ones letting us go may also be trying to minimize further hurt to either party. Prolonging a mismatch uncomfortableness can feel like a unnecessary self inflicted suffering. Feel reassured to know that in any type of relationship, there are occurrences of disagreements, returning, giving space, and trying or not to work things out.

Building solid relationships are not as instant as people think, they get stronger over time. The ones who make time for us, stand by us and work on building a better stronger relationship are the ones worth our time who show us we are worth theirs. As we get older, many of us have experienced people returning back into our lives and friends becoming lovers.

Along the way, we experience love and are surrounded by people who enjoy us. We are capable and deserving of being loved over and over again throughout our lives and ccasionally, we will have to use these phrases delicately to turn someone down with an attempt to minimize hurt feelings, out of love.